Countdown to The Best Moments of 2013

These are the top moments in my life that made it. Can't believe it! Some good times and laughs and farewells and goodbyes and some sad times too. 2013 what a year it has been.

1. Alrighty 2013 has come to and end. This is the best way to end 2013. Got to go up to Salt Lake City.
It was so much fun. Cant wait to do it again next year. (:

2. This year was the year that we took kick ball to a whole new level. It was so much fun. it was cold and snowing but it was so much fun. hahaha were pretty crazy. And even better it was at my old elementary school. and I'm pretty sure the security camera got it all on tape. LOL

3. This year i turned 21 years old. I'm legal to go to clubs and drink legally if i wanted to  and its been the best haha its been a little fun being 21 especially joking about going to clubs haaha doing stuff 21 year old's do hahahaha.

4. Went to my friends high school graduation from AFHS. It was so much fun going and seeing them graduate we were a little late going to it but we caught a lot of our friends outside before they left.

                                       

5. I'm not a fan of cutting my hair. I honestly hate my short hair. Takes forever to grow out. I personally love my long hair. I know short hair is cute on me too. But i rather have my long hair. Its growing a lot but still short. I don't ever wanna cut it this short ever again. But a least i donated my hair.

6. Moving has been a big part of my life. 2013 is the year we moved. Were constantly moving and having to deal with so much stress and packing and unpacking . It hasn't been easy with moving.

7. Another mission farewell. So hard to say goodbye to this boy. He's my best friend! he's also my crush. (:
Told him how i felt about him and he's cool with it. He's happy and glad i told him. Its been fun getting to know him and spending time with him has been the best.

8.  A mission farewell. My best friend Silas is a Missionary. He left earlier this year in March to serve his 2 year mission in Spain. (: and of course i had to meet the hot boy that's standing on the right side next to me his name is Carson.

9. the beginning of 2013! got to hang out with my best friend Chaylyn. Don't get to hang out with her anymore like we used to but its so much fun hanging out with her. 

Tis The Season of Helping

Its that time of year to help other people and be nice and kind and help them out. Like a pay it forward type thing. Yesterday while at Wal-Mart after we done our shopping we got in line to pay for our stuff. In front of us there was a woman with a cart full of stuff looking at our cart and seeing how little stuff we had. She let us go in front of her so we did and she was nice enough to let us in front of her and knowing she had a cart full of stuff. I started thinking we should help her out. I'd feel so bad if we didn't help her out so I talked my mom into it and we took our stuff out to the trunk and than we just walked back inside and found her and told her we'd be happy to help her out since she was nice enough to let us go first. She already had stuff in her cart and was paying for it and than we walked outside with her to her car and helped her put her stuff in the car she has been out all day shopping she wanted to get her Christmas shopping all done so she didn't have to worry about it after yesterday. After we were done she said thank you to us for the help and wished us a Merry Christmas and we got in our car and left. And knowing it was getting dark and late and she probably needed to get home to her family and it was cold outside so I felt the need to help her out and  now that's the nicest thing to do just by simply helping someone out even if they say they don't need your help just do it. I'm glad myself that I did it. It feels good to be able to help someone out during the holiday season. It rarely happens cause there's so much hate and mean in the world. But even just helping a neighbor they will surely be thankful enough that you helped them out even if they didn't need it. It shows that there is kind nice caring people out in the world even if its not much a least you did something nice for once and you'll be glad you did it.  Its the right thing to do even if I didn't do it id feel so guilty if I didn't do it.

12 Years Ago Today....





 12 years ago today in honor of my Grandpa Carroll......  

 

 

Love and Miss him so very much. <3 I hope heaven is treating him well.

 

5 Months Left to Go

The other day we officially figured out that we are moving in 5 months. Yay finally! Can't wait to get out of this house. That would make me so freaking happy I didn't even want to live here in the first place. This house is like junk it really is junk we have problems with the mold and its gonna start making us sick and it went away for awhile but today it came back and it smelt really bad. It was so nice not smelling that stinky smell months ago but for some odd reason it has come back today and this is the first time in months since we smelt this mold smell and honestly it smells like a skunk has died it really does. Its freaking horrible. Today has been the worst day that its smelt so horrible. I didn't even wanna do anything cause it stunk so bad my room and Paul's room are the only rooms that didn't get this nasty smell in our rooms and its nice cause its like I just wanna get out and leave the nasty smell and coming into my room and staying in here and I keep my door closed at all times especially when I go out of my room I don't want the smell spreading to my room all though it tends to come through. But I'm totally excited to move out of here and get a fresh new start on a new healthy house and hopefully we wont have to put up with any of this nasty smelling crap anymore.
6 months will put us in April 2014 so next April I will get to have fun moving which I really don't like moving but I've never been so freaking excited to move. I told my Best Friend that I was moving and he was like oh my gosh again? and he asked where you moving to? I said I don't know and he asked are you moving to California?? Hahaha DUDE I wouldn't put it past us we could end up in California hahahahaha. He's like oh my gosh do you guys ever settle down? Hahaha nope not really it doesn't seem like we do huh? and he said nope it doesn't look like you guys ever settle down. We just gotta move every where. Ahhh It will be soo nice to leave this behind and start all over hahahahaha and he  said you need to move back here to Spanish Fork. I said oh you really want me there don't you? he's like yes I do. I can tell my buddy misses me living there. I don't blame I miss living there too. Its my childhood home I know on my Facebook page which is only for the friends and family I know and I only accept friends that I know personally and on there it says North Las Vegas as my hometown but Spanish fork no doubt still and will always be my hometown.  I can't wait to find out where we will move to. Hopefully we can pick a house that makes us happy and is healthy for us cause right now this house we live in is not safe. I'm surprised the Health department hasn't even bothered to come check it out even though they might end up having us evacuate the house both houses will be evacuated and both these houses will be gone before we know it cause its really really bad. I'm just to the point where I wanna end 2013 already thank god we only have one more month seriously I just wanna get 2014 started already so sick of this year cant wait to get out of this misery and dump and get happy again.

Best Friends

 

 

Known my Best Friend for 4 years now. (: She's the best friend I could ask for. We've been through thick and thin. She's been there for me a lot especially during these past 2 years. Its been so much fun having her as a friend. I honestly don't know what id do without this girl. She is seriously the BEST! she has really bought a lot of laughter into my life and has helped me through SO MUCH! She also has been a big help to my family its like she takes the time out of her day to help us. I hate it when I put her through situations but she's willing to be a Best friend and be there for me through it all and help out. She is so nice and she is freaking pretty I'm so freaking jealous of her hair its so naturally curly and I cant save my life to do that with a curl iron all day. She's amazing she is really the coolest girl I know. Our stupid sense of humor especially mine the things we talk about the inside jokes we have about stuff it never fails to not laugh every time we are around each other. We really do enjoy having fun with each other and I never get tired of her. We seriously have a blast hanging out with each other and we enjoy each others company and I cherish our friendship I really do. She knows what its like for me and my family to move since she helped with our 2 moves so far it hasn't been easy but the time that we get to spend with each other we use it to spend as much as time as possible with each other. She's like my other half she's also my room mate while she's over here. When she leaves its like oh no where did she go. Than its like I Miss my other half. I seriously really do miss her a lot I haven't seen her in almost 2 months. Haha we are so crazy but if you get to know both of us were the type that seem really cool and calm we just are the type that kick back and relax and chill. I'm glad she has came into my life its like she was supposed to come into my life. She's my laughing buddy from Junior Year (: Than we became the best of friends during Senior Year. We became inseparable but its been hard I've gone through my with drawls of missing her and not seeing her everyday anymore. Teachers thought we wouldn't hang out anymore after high school cause " life changes" For now me and her have been hanging out trying to use this time as much as possible before our life's really take a change. I'm glad she's a part of my life. I hope we can continue to staying friends and I cant wait to see where both of us end up in life. Its crazy were both in our 20's already. And I met her when I was 17 and she was 16 yes I'm a year older than her and taller than her. You can tell if you see me and her in person you can tell that I'm taller. I don't even know how to thank her for everything she has done for me. She is really the best friend and that's what best friends are for so a big THANK YOU! (: to my best friend for everything she has sacrificed for me and my family truly the best! (: 

 

 

Just Friends

Lately there is a certain someone that has thought that there is something going on between me and my best friend. Clearly there is nothing going on between me and him. Were just best friends heck our friendship can barely survive with me and him. I just wanna make it clear that there is nothing going on. I wish that someone would understand there's not. Sorry to make her mad but he's my friend too so I can talk to him all I want heck I even can talk to him all night if I wanted. I'm his friend too and he likes talking to me too and with this certain someone acting different and not herself me and him have became only closer were trying to help each other cope with the new her and its not going so well at all. I feel sorry for her that she has decided to let satin in her life but maybe one day she will learn the consequences. And he's the only one there for me in this since he's known her since 6th grade too and he's trying to help me figure out what we can do with her and honestly were lost we give up. Were done! we don't know what to do with her and we don't know how to help her. He's really sad that me and her will pretty much be done being friends he really doesn't want to see me and her end the friendship. I'm sorry if I made her feel this way I hope one day she can realize that there is nothing going on and all i'm doing is ending up defending him every time me and her talk about him. Sure he teases me and messes with me but that's our friendship he really likes messing with girls especially me. I don't know if me and him will ever date it could happen but not right now its not the right time right now with him being on his mission. I wish there was a way I could talk to her about this and make it very clear but I really cant so i'm stuck.

2 Years Today

2 years ago today I lost my Grandma Carroll we all miss and love her. Crazy how fast time flies by fast. Nothing makes me happier than knowing she is in heaven with my Grandpa again. I will forever remember the dream I had about her when I got to see her and talk to her one last time after she died and I'm pretty lucky the only one in my family that got to see her young again. It may feel like its going to be forever till I get to see her again. But during this time God be with her till we meet again.
All the fun memories we have with her. Yeah she's had 2 strokes before she died so sad but yet so funny. We get a kick out of the whole "I called a taxi to come take me away so you guys don't have to worry about me" that was funny but sad at the same time. I'm not gonna talk about my dream I had about her but I know she's told me everything's going to be okay and she loves me and wants me to be happy and she said that she will always be here for me just in my heart now.

I just wanted to add in a note I wrote to her for her funeral day 2 years ago.

Grandma,
I want you to know I love you so very much and I'll miss you like crazy. Thanks for
everything you are the best grandma I've had in my life. I wish I could just hug you one last time it wasn't easy seeing you go like this. We had some fun times together when me and Eric were kids and we would come over and we would go outside in the back to blow bubbles and you would blow bubbles for us and we'd try to pop them and one of the memories I have with you is playing school and kitchen and we would pretend to cook food. Thanks for making those memories with me. I know you want me to be happy too. I remember my Junior year in high school I would tell my parents that I wanted you to be around for my graduation and when I was a Senior in high school before I graduated I just wanted you here for my graduation and you were able to be here. I know you weren't able to be there but you got to hear all about it and see me in my cap and gown. I know you were so proud of me. Thanks for being here for my 19th birthday. You were always worried about me and my brothers and when we were sick you would tell mom and dad to take us to the doctors when we knew it was just a simple cold and we would get over it. I guess it's goodbye for now I have a special place in my heart and I can't wait to see you again someday. Tell grandpa hi for me.
Love Jessica

I really hope she's enjoying heaven and I hope she is happy and I hope she's taking care of grandpa. I hope she's not partying to hard cause were not there to party with her. I hope she watches over us and helps keeps us safe and I really hope she looks down to see me smile cause I know she loved my smile. (:

Topic of the day: People Change

This is like sad! People change and someone I know so close to me that means so much to me has changed into someone their not. I know I've changed but as I've changed I made sure I still have the Jessica everyone knows and loves and likes. But its really hard to be there for them since they changed. Its sad someone I once knew became someone I used to know. Honestly our friendship hasn't always been perfect either we've had our moments and been through thick and thin. I honestly thought this would never happen. She means so much to me I value our friendship and have so much fun with her we've grown up together I know it hasn't been so easy getting along either but I honestly don't know what to do I'm having a hard time getting to know the new her. Its like she forgot that she knew everything about me. Its just been very awkward and weird talking to her a lot. I will never ever give up on someone I know I need to be there for her but I feel like just giving up and once she finds herself she can come back to me if she remembers me. I know as you get older you change and the things that you had in common with your friends becomes different and you just suddenly loose interest in everything that your friend has in common with you. I know we have our likes and dislikes we both don't like the same thing and that's okay. But still to grow up and grow apart from each other its sad. I knew it would happen one day and honestly I didn't think it would happen till I got married but I guess that one day is now. It makes me wanna cry.



Me and her may be having a struggle and she may of lost her self and she might be going down the wrong path and let satin in but no matter what happens I'm afraid to loose my Best Friend. I'd hate to loose her and I honestly don't know what id do without her. She has changed but the memories haven't changed and I wont ever forget the memories.

 

 

I hope one day me and her will be on good terms and it really does hurt remembering who she used to be. But for now until she finds her self I guess I'll keep hanging on tight and keep hoping that she can get back on the right track. I know one day she will need me if she even remembers who I am.

 



Oh My Gosh! How Much I've Changed.

Talk about growing up into a beautiful young woman. (: The one on the left was taken when I was in 5th Grade. The one on the right was just recently after I turned 21. Freaking heck. Curse my cuteness I might as well be cute. (: Crazy how fast time flies by. And the right one it may look like I have make up on I don't its all natural. :) I've changed so much. Its Crazy!!!

Happy Happy Birthday to Me

On Saturday we celebrated my 21st birthday early we went to Texas Road house it was so yummy they had some good food and of course we were joking about me having a beer hahahaha cause my grandpa was like now she can come with me to get a beer hahahahaha. but I wasn't officially 21 yet. And after the dinner we went to my grandma's house and celebrated my birthday and I got a snickers cake it was so yummy and I opened her present that she got me. It was a blast on Saturday I had so much fun. And Yesterday was my birthday my official 21st birthday and I got another cake since there wasn't much left of  the snickers cake and my dad took me out to lunch and even though it was their anniversary too they let me have the day and they are gonna go out to dinner tonight and than he got me my favorite game ever my favorite Sims 3 game and I got other stuff to and its been so much fun. My BFF sang happy birthday to me over Skype and a lot of people wished me happy birthday on Facebook. all in all my 21st birthday was a good one. I still can't believe it I'm now legal to drink and all that fun stuff if I wanted to drink I could but I really don't want to drink never happening in this life time that's for sure.

Happy October! :)

I can't believe its already October. Like where did half the year go?? crazy how this year is just flying by so fast. Only 3 months left of this year and than we go into 2014! Soooo Crazy. But I cant wait for the Holidays to start all though i'm not really a fall/winter person.

I'm also getting excited cause tomorrow we celebrate my 21st birthday. Me my family and my cousin Steven and Grandma and Grandpa are going to Texas Road house for the first time. Can't wait go eat there.

And the best part is that there is only

left till I turn 21! All though i'll probably be spending it by myself. I don't celebrate with friends anymore. I grew out of that a long time ago. But on Monday i'll be celebrating my official 21st birthday. So the real "Happy Birthday" wont happen till Monday. I might just make myself a pink cake and frost 21 all over it.

What a Good Day

Today me and my mom went to Church for the first time since we moved. We've been so busy and my mom works over night at Wal-Mart a lot so she rarely had Sundays off and this week they switched her schedule. Today was about missionary work and we got to hear from Spanish speaking missionary sisters they got to come to our ward for the day even though they belong to the Hispanic Spanish ward and we also have two elder missionary's that we will get to hear from later in the year.
It was a good day I should say it was nice to hear about missionary work and I loved the story the sister missionary was sharing how she was a convert and how she loved having the gospel in her life and how it changed her life and her family's life too. The gospel is truly amazing and i'm happy to have it apart of my life. I wouldn't change it. And we met the Relief society president and we also got to meet with the Bishop and found out some information about singles ward. Cant remember his name but his son goes to singles ward so he called him and asked him what time singles ward starts and where it was at. I now got a friend at singles ward that will be looking out for me whenever I come and he knows my name since his dad told him my name. Can't wait to meet him whenever I decide to go to singles ward. I couldn't stay through the rest of the time cause since I have a really bad sinus infection the medicine I take for it kicks in and makes me really tired and I get to the point I have to really sleep. But its been a good day. A least I was able to make it to securement but soon i'll be going over to the singles ward maybe a few weeks later after general conference I'll go to the singles ward. I'm feeling to young in the family ward no one there is my age or either got married and stayed in the ward. besides I want to be off my medicine before I go back to church.

10 Days

 

 

Till my 21st Birthday Yayy!!! :D :D :D

My Day at the Doctors

Yesterday morning I went back to the doctors ( I just got so fed up with this) and I wanted to find out what's been going on and why I'm getting constant headaches and migraines. Finally got that all figured out. My doctor knows what happened he knew I had a head injury and suffered from a concussion and I reminded him about what happened even though it happened like a month ago.
anyways he decided to have me try out some stuff like physical movement and he had me bend over and he asked if that hurt my head? I said yeah it does hurt and I had to point where my head hurt most and he said okay and he decided to do something and tap his fingers against my forehead and it freaking hurt I was pulling my head away from his hand and the way I moved we could tell that something was wrong so he tapped around my face but the forehead was the only place that hurt. So he asked me if I had any allergy's lately along with itchy eyes and a cough and a runny nose. I said not that I know of and than he said yeah I know what's going on here you have a really bad sinus infection. I've never had a sinus infection so here goes the first one.  He prescribed me some medicine and I have to take one every 12 hours every day for 14 days. So I'm happy we got this all taken care of. Finally can be happy for awhile even though I feel so miserable and tired and sleepy and drained. I've gotta drink lots of water with the medicine that I'm taking I guess its to help so I don't get sick to my stomach. I hope this will work but I guess I will see in 14 days when the medicine is all gone. Hopefully this is it for now and I don't have to see a neurologist after all either so I got some relief from that. I have the type of cyst that starts with an A and its most common in people now days and it rarely bothers people but a least I know what's going on with this. Unless the cyst really bothers me than i'm fine for now. All I gotta do is get rid of this sinus infection. (:

How can a Mom Hate Her Own Daughter so Much??

I ask this question "how can a mom hate her own daughter?" to myself a lot lately. I know she loves me and wants what's best for me. Every parent wants what's best for their kids. I wonder if my moms mom (my grandma) hated her and treated her with disrespect when she was growing up.

I mean my mom judges me way too much and is so disrespectful to me. The other day she judged me on my hair and she was telling me that it was time for my haircut like excuse me it's my hair not yours. I miss having my long hair I love my long hair and I want it back. She told me no you don't need long hair anymore it doesn't look good on you and it just sits on your head. Like what the??? and I said you dare to have my hair cut I'm gonna have them shave your hair off. I'm not even kidding either I will. my hair is barely growing right now hell to the no I don't need another hair cut its my hair I can have it long or short. I told my friends about this and they both said what the heck??
I tell my mom when its time for me to get a hair cut and she takes me to get it done. She doesn't tell me when I need my hair cut. You should be able to tell your mom when its time for a haircut not the other way around. I'm like yeah I know right?

Than the other day she started getting so mad at me because I was wide awake at 5AM in the morning the other night and because of all the headaches I've been getting and my head injury I've suffered from she thought I wasn't getting enough sleep. Because I've had headaches almost every day and she's like telling me to go to sleep at 11PM and wake up at 8AM every day for 2 weeks. I argued with her for a good while and said uh huh sure whatever. I'm not going to bed at 11PM she got mad cause I should be getting 8 hours of sleep. So I faked it and said fine I would go to bed at 11PM so she'd get off my back. Well later that night I didn't go to bed at 11PM I was supposed to but Jennifer called me on Skype and talked to me for awhile till she went to bed. I really didn't go to bed till 2AM and no sign of headache and I slept really well the last few nights and I still gotten headaches no matter what. And of course my mom told my grandma about this like oh my gosh you have to tell grandma its not really her business of course she doesn't like that I say up late either. It's like she's controlling my life and its getting annoying. I'm the adult now I can do whatever I want she doesn't have say in what I do anymore and it seems like she wants to see me fail in life and she doesn't want me to succeed in life either a least that's what it feels like.

I'm not her 2 year old anymore.  I know it's sad that I'm growing up freaking heck I'm almost 21. They don't have guardianship over me. They dropped it when I turned 18. I'm glad they dropped it I already have problems with my parents anyways don't need them controlling my life.

Freaking heck its my life I'm not gonna change because she wants me too. She's trying to change me into someone that I'm not and for someone that she wants. Freaking heck I'm only once let me live it up and let me screw it up for once. I've been getting so mad at her lately we haven't gotten along at all  when I was growing up. I haven't really liked my mom at all. I think ever since the way she treated me growing up kind of scared me for life. I thought a mom was supposed to love her daughter
no mater what she does but I guess I'm wrong. I'm so happy me and her don't get along I couldn't save my life to get along with her. I think its meant to be that way. It's gotten worse growing up as a teenager there was no way getting along with her and id think as an adult now it would be a little better getting along with her but nope. I do respect my parents though I'm old enough I can a least give them some respect even if we don't get along I'm mature about it and show them some respect.

But if I ever have a daughter in the future I'm not ever gonna treat her this way. I'm gonna be the cool mom for my daughter and be a mom that she can get along with and be able to talk to me without no problem and I will know what she's going to be going through as I've gone through it all growing and changing. Hopefully my future daughter and I can be able to communicate with each other. I don't want my daughter to hate me.

If things were different than maybe my mom and I could get along but I have my reasons to hate my mom and be happy that I don't get along with her I know she's trying to care for me but she can stop. I just don't see us getting along anytime soon.

Let the countdown Begin...

 

 

 

 

Left till I'm 21. Sooo Crazy.

Favorite Songs

Not really big into both of these new and up coming boy bands but dang.

Emblem3 Yeah I'm not into them right now. But I'm totally digging this song. (:

 

She Ain't You by 4Count. I'm totally loving this song right now its so catchy and plus the boys are so hot! ;)

12 years later... Remembering what happend on 9/11

12 years ago today.....

 

Never will ever forget this day.

 

 

United we stand.

                                 

 

This Makes Me So Happy

I can't believe it already

From today I will be turning

This makes me soooo happy!!! (: I'm looking forward to 21. I still can't believe it though 21 already. I'm getting old. LOL!

Update on my Head

Just when I thought everything was okay cause I never heard the results from the doctors about the results of my cat scan. It was yesterday when I finally got the news of the results the doctor called me and asked if I had ever heard back from the hospital or the other doctor about the results. I said nope I thought everything was okay since I haven't heard anything. Well, she was surprised that no one called me to let me know what was going on. She continued and said well I have the results from your cat scan. And this is when the news hit me. She first started off saying your head is okay it doesn't look like you damaged it from hitting it... I said okay. and she said but there's been a change.... I said what you mean? she said well the cat scan shows that you have a cyst on your brain.
Not knowing what she was talking about I was confused and I was asking her what she meant by a cyst and she told me that I basically have a bubble hanging on the side of my brain. Its full of fluid but it doesn't look like its life threatening unless its bothering you. and she was just checking up on me about my headaches and how I felt. I said well right now the headache's are coming and going away now. Other than that I feel so much better now. She started suggesting that it may be best if I see a neurologist for this. But not knowing what to do since its not really life threatening at the moment it hasn't bothered me. She told me that she would talk to my regular doctor about it and see what he wants me to do. She said yeah that's probably where that long week of headaches were coming from was from the cyst and its probably putting so much pressure on your head that its causing headaches. But after that she said she would let me know what to do next she said she was going to call me back tomorrow (today) and so after all that after I found out I said thanks so much for letting me know that I have this cyst on my head. And we just hung up after all that and I told my parents what I found out... Were all stuck how did I get a cyst on brain? That's the first question they had and than they asked if I heard the doctor the right way and I said yeah I heard everything she was telling me and we tried looking up all about this cyst on my brain and not knowing the symptoms of this I really don't know how to feel or what to expect. I guess tomorrow if anything maybe Monday I will hear from them again. Since I went up to Idaho and I don't have a working cell phone and my grandma's cell phone doesn't have much air time on it. So my mom called us and let me know that the doctors office had called and I couldn't really call them back especially since my grandma is like well I wouldn't mess with it cause they will put you on hold and it will take forever to talk to the doctor.
So I guess tomorrow or Monday I will either call them back or they will call me back. I'm hoping this goes away on its own maybe it will just start going away on its own cause I cant afford anymore visits to the hospital and I really can't afford the doctors either at this time. Plus were gonna talk to the doctor and see if we can put me on a program to help me pay for all of this and also get me on some medication to help this go away cause I want to avoid the biggest thing ever having surgery done.

The Sims 4

I'm totally getting really into The Sims 4 already. It hasn't come out yet not until next year but it looks really interesting and different really different. It kind of does remind me of Sims 2 though.
But since the game is just being made and they are working on it than I don't know what to expect until they talk more about it and show us more video's. It looks pretty cool now that they have emotions finally.

This really has me looking forward to it a lot.

and this arrival trailer just pretty much gets interesting the way they introduce the Sims in Sims 4.

Happy Birthday to my Mom/ Paul's First Day of School

Today was my mom's 51st Birthday. She's getting old now. We didn't do anything special but we did celebrate her birthday on Sunday with the family. So it was pretty good. Today Paul also started his first day of 5th grade. He also got homework on his first day. Thankfully it was just a simple math worksheet for him. Here goes to another year of school. One more grade to go and he's done with Elementary. Hopefully he will keep his head up and do awesome at school this year. This is the grade he also gets the puberty talk. He's gotten a lot of questions with that. but i'm glad he had a good day at school. Hopefully he starts making some new friends so he can have someone to play with and not be on his computer all day long. he only has 7 years left of school left. Crazyy!

People Change

Today I was just thinking about how people change I've changed and so has the person I once knew. People really do change and I used to know the person that has changed. Don't know what the heck his problem has been but it makes me miss the old him. We used to hang out and talk a lot and he's my best friend since 6th grade. Its sad to see people change. It hurts to even know that I once knew him. But I guess its for the best we obviously have grown a part. We can barely talk anymore he's got a grudge against me and he really doesn't want to talk about it either and he's just a big jerk now. I'm not liking this new him. I'm just done with him. I know deep down we can pull through this but if he cant talk to me anymore. Than we have a problem. And this had me thinking about people changing like I know I've changed and obviously it looks like he's changed too maybe somewhere there was a friendship a long time ago when we were younger but now things have changed especially between me and him. Can't have a good conversation anymore its obvious he can't stand talking to me or talking about me now. I used to have fun hanging out with him I used to have fun talking to him. I don't have a crush on him anymore whatsoever. But it makes me wanna cry cause he's been my best friend. I'm not sure what to do I really want to end the friendship with him. When he talks to me he makes me feel like I'm dumb and stupid that he doesn't really want to talk to me. I don't understand what's his problem and I don't think I will ever know. But I guess its for the best now. Its just sad.




I really hope we can figure something out but if I cant talk to him about it than I guess its pointless cause we either fix what's got him holding a grudge against him or just break it and say goodbye.
I think its for the best that it ends. If I'm done with him I don't care if Jennifer and Shaliece talk to him I could freaking care less if they talk to each other or hang out with each other not that i'm gonna get mad or anything. I'm happy with my other best friend in my life even though we don't talk anymore but still he remains my best friend.

People really do change and Love does really hurt. Sadly friends leave and things go wrong. But I gotta remember that life goes on.

 
 

oh the Joy and Fun

Yesterday I had my fun and joy of being at the doctors I finally got this head injury checked out by a doctor it was a girl doctor but she works under my doctor at urgent care. It freaking took forever to get out of there. I got weighed and found out I now weigh 112.2 Pounds so I've lost some weight I used to be 102.5 pounds. So while at the doctors we were trying to figure out what to do with me and my head injury that happened 2 weeks ago. Told them the symptoms and everything and the doctor went to talk to my doctor but he wasn't on call yesterday so she ended up talking to a different doctor about it and they decided to just send me to the hospital. I tell you its a freaking pain in the butt. We were hoping to not go that way but the doctors wanted me to go I had no choice but to get a cat scan done. I was asking how i can get rid of this headache I keep having and she was supposed to give me some Ibuprofen but I guess she forgot and she didn't want to prescribe me anything yet and she said she could of gave me a shot but she didn't want me all loopy and dizzy at the hospital since they were sending me there. Came home in time for Paul to meet his 5th grade teacher and school starts on Tuesday for him finally. And than we went over to my grandma's house for some stuff and my mom had to pay off a loan and came home in time to drop the stuff off and head off to the hospital. It took awhile to go through registration we weren't to thrilled got to go back to Tempanogos Hospital luckily they had some records of me from when I was 7 years old and my first head injury happened. Got that all taken care of and just went into the radiology room where they do X-ray's and had to wait for awhile for a doctor to come get me for it. So finally got that taken care of and I guess everything is okay cause I didn't hear back from the doctors or hospital. But I may still go back to the doctors this next week to get some stronger medicine or a shot to kill these headaches I keep having. Its been a pretty interesting day yesterday but i'm happy i'm finally feeling better just got the headaches.

2 Weeks Ago

I hit my forehead pretty hard against the countertop 2 weeks ago. It happened on a Saturday that both of my parents were working and I was putting something away underneath the sink. And before I knew it my head collided with the countertop/sink. Since than I haven't been normal. I felt okay after I hit my head but than the next day came and I felt yucky I felt weird I felt like something wasn't normal and I had a hard time sleeping id dose off and keep waking up and keep falling asleep finally I was able to get a good nap in after all that. I took some aspirin more like ibuprofen and kept reading stories online what to do with a mild concussion I honestly didn't know what to do and what other people did when they had mild concussions. I started feeling better and thought well maybe it wasn't anything and than last Saturday it hit. I got this massive headache that hit me pretty good woke up with it and just thought maybe cause it was my time of the month and usually that happens having a headache on the first day. I shook it off took some ibuprofen and went on with my daily things that I did and I slept it off and everything and it wouldn't go away it stayed through out the week so far its been almost one week since I had this headache its made me feel so hopeless I've been trying to find answers what to do with a concussion and a headache at first the headaches weren't to bad but as the week went by the stronger the more severe my headache became. I felt like I didn't want to do anything I haven't been in the mood to really enjoy anything I don't blame myself its hard to enjoy something fun when you got a headache and all that is on your mind is the pain and headache that won't go away. I've been a sleepy girl lately cause sleep is like the only thing that can take away the headache that's until I wake up again and its back. But than again I can't sleep all day and all night I have things to do I just cant sleep through it all I don't need to develop a sleeping problem . But I have no idea what's going on and my dad thought I might of bruised it. So when I kept complaining about what was wrong with me my dad finally gave up and said you know maybe its time to have it checked out and see whats happening. He thought I may of tightened my neck muscles when that happened but when he checked there was no sign of tight muscles. So he said we will have to get you into a doctor when I get paid. And my mom wouldn't want to believe that I hit it pretty hard it wasn't just a hit and i'm fine it was a hit. It could of been worse I could of blacked out on the kitchen floor and I wouldn't be able to yell for help and of course all Paul would do is freak out and not know what to do. So finally I told my mom the story of what happened I said look it wasn't just some hit and I feel fine after words it was a pretty hard hit. I wish I could of avoided it but it just happened to fast.
So I haven't gotten any better since than I felt really weird and just trying to cope with it and its like I have a hard time thinking i'm not thinking as normal as I used to my memory is kind of messed up right now and I can't remember certain things since this happened. I know I understand my parents we don't have insurance its going to kill paying for a doctors visit. My mom kept saying oh she will be fine it will pass. My dad said its been 2 weeks 2 weeks. Its a head injury you don't mess with those. You really don't you don't wanna take a chance and ignore it. It could be something serious and it could damage the brain. Something is going on with her and she can feel it and obviously it isn't gonna get any better. Honestly it hasn't I just keep feeling more worse and I also hit my head in the shower by accident both are accidents but when I bumped my head in the shower it wasn't that hard just a hit and I started feeling really dizzy after that. So finally we gave in and called the doctors office on Wednesday but couldn't get me into see my doctor cause he's booked he's freaking busy so now I gotta go to Urgent care and see a doctor there. I was supposed to go today but no some things ended up happening my parents got in an argument over it and she said well I want her to try Tylenol extra strength. So my mom got me that and I tried it twice today it helped but I still feel like there is something going on and it doesn't feel right. So tomorrow I'm gonna go see a doctor at urgent care and see if we can find out whats happening and see if there is away of getting rid of this annoying headache that I badly wanna get rid of. I'd hate to live the rest of my life knowing that I hit my head and that I keep getting headaches like this. I really hope we find out whats going on with my head.

My Career and College

Talk about career and college and stuff and its like I haven't always wanted to be a teacher. I was in kindergarten when I wanted to be a "Doctor" at that time I didn't know girls were nurses not doctors but I did want to be a nurse and help kids feel better when they were sick. But as I got into Junior High and High School it has changed especially since I had to write a report on my past pleasant and future and I just love kids like the joy they bring and the imagination that they have and the fun and energy they have its just amazing. And I knew as I was writing a report on my past pleasant and future I knew that I wanted to be a teacher I've known since I was in 10th grade what I wanted to be and I had it all planned out and I still do. At the time I didn't know what type of teacher and than it hit me I wanted to be a pre school teacher. and that's what i'm studying to go into early education and elementary education. Someone recently suggested to me that I should try and become a kindergarten teacher. I still can work on my associates degree for early education but I should try and push it but she said its up to me and that it would work out cause I found out that kindergarten teachers get paid more than pre school teachers. Its awesome that I do want to be a pre school teacher. I seriously would never be a high school teacher after how we treated our teachers in high school my class was horrible with it students would treat teachers with disrespect and treat them really awful especially me I would treat my own teachers with crap I'd give them the hardest time ever. I still need to really think this through and make sure its something I want to do. I really don't wanna just do it cause someone told me to do it. But if I decide to than I am on the right path. I've got a lot in store for me and its like the doors are finally opening to the things I need in life. (: Its like an unexpected thing in life its like becoming an opportunity to either take or pass it. And right now a lot sounds good and its worth it. But just having to spend a few more years in college is a lot. But i'm happy with the way things are going its been the best. I've been seriously blessed. I honestly can't wait to start working with kids in a classroom its going to be awesome

Flashback (:

Taking it back 4 or 5 years ago. Flashback (:  


This was taken 4 or 5 years ago on our last final day in Las Vegas before we moved back to Utah.
The Long hair I had when I was 15 and 16 years old. (:

Happy Birthday to My Best Friend!!!

Ahhh! Today my Best Friend is 20 years old. Happy Birthday to my freaking awesome Best Friend Eddy! (: We've been through thick and thin and I've been there for him like he was for me. He's been the best. We have a history together and we became so close and honestly he became my best friend even more than that my boyfriend. Not once do I ever regret having that boy in my life or meeting him. I'm happy he was apart of my life he's got one awesome personality and we just have this connection with each other. He's done the best job at being the best boyfriend to me. He's just all around fun to be around and he's just cool and awesome especially since I cant speak Spanish or I'm not from Cuba and he is and that's awesome to have a friend that is from a different place and can speak Spanish. he's my first boyfriend so of course i'm always gonna have some what of a feeling and I still do love him just not in the same way I used to. I hope he has the best birthday ever and hope he's doing okay since we don't get to talk much and I can't wait to see him again one day when we go back to Las Vegas. But I hope he has the best 20th birthday ever. He's no longer a teenager now he's just a normal adult which is crazy. I'll be turning 21 soon so it wont be long being the same age as him since I'm a year older than him.

10 Years Later.....

The other day while cleaning out my room and getting rid of stuff I don't want anymore. I found my diary from like 10 years ago and I wrote in it in 2004 and only 4 months while I was in 6th grade was all I written in it. We packed it up and I thought I lost my diary or threw it away. I didn't take it with me to Las Vegas when we moved and than a year ago I found my diary in a box of books that we had. I obviously missed something when I looked through it. A year later I looked through it again and look what I found :) hahahahahaha this was drawn all over a page in my diary like who did this?

hahaha who ever did this must of made their mark in my book. While I don't know who this was or don't even remember if I did this. I found it kind of funny that I found this and as I found this I was just flipping through my diary and passed this page and than realized what I just saw and went back to this page. Who ever or whenever this was its amazing hahaha. I kind of like it now i'm not gonna rip it out or get mad about it. It's the best thing that has happened to my boring lame diary hahaha.